discern this

We are an Easter People, and even at the grave, Alleluia is our song.

This is where a clever title would go, if I had one. November 20, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — discernthis @ 12:00 am

I don’t have a whole bunch to say; I’m posting because I’ve been feeling guilty again about not posting more. I suppose I have a decent excuse in the fact that my computer charger has gone kaput and that I only have battery life when I’m able to/remember to borrow Kevin’s charger or one from someone at school or internship long enough to fully charge it. My old standby excuse of NO TIME AT ALL EVER NOT EVER remains, but that’ll hopefully go away in about a month. December 20 is the last day of the semester for me, and yes, I’m counting down. I even have a fancy little countdown app on my phone that helps me keep track. It is also counting down to the end of field for the semester (24), days until the end of field altogether (149), and graduation (178). Mind you, those will all drop by one day in about five and a half minutes. I find it’s helping to keep me slightly sane, though I feel like I’m back in grade school counting the days til Spring Break.
Life is feeling slightly less panicky, but I’m still struggling. When I find myself slipping a bit too far down the Pity Party Path, I try to remember to be thankful for the myriad of blessings I have. It usually works to shut down my emotional overload. Adorable pets also help. No pictures this time though, because I left my phone at Kevin’s this evening and won’t get it back til tomorrow. I’m frightfully dependent on that thing… Trust me though, they’re wicked cute.
So yes, I’m blessed, far more than I can even comprehend. And it’s a short week!


It’s a hard knock life November 13, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — discernthis @ 10:39 am

There are moments when troubles enter our lives and we can do nothing to avoid them.
But they are there for a reason. Only when we have overcome them will we understand why they were there.
Paulo Coelho, The Fifth Mountain

While it’s been a rough few months, and an especially rough week, I’ve been struck again and again by how incredibly blessed I am and how much I have to be grateful for.  But I am healthy. I am loved. I have a safe and warm place to sleep at night. I have healthy food to eat. I have amazing supportive friends and family. I have so few of the daily struggles that people around me face.

If I take time to breathe, I know that I’m going to get through whatever struggle or struggles are plaguing me right now. If I take time to listen, I know that I have amazing support from everyone around me. If I take time to reflect, I know that I’ll be stronger on the other side. If I take enough time to breathe, listen, reflect, and pray, I can be stronger even as I go through it all.

So that’s my goal for right now. Still, I’ll gratefully accept any extra prayers you have laying around.




A selection of random thoughts November 5, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — discernthis @ 12:51 am

I’ve been feeling guilty about not posting here. I actually haven’t even been writing like I want to. Between back-to-back weekends traveling, three midterms in one week, migraine marathons, planning a conference, and internship, and working, I hardly have time to breathe, much less write. My commutes have become my sanctuary time…I turn the radio off and just have time for reflection. Without that, I’m not sure where I’d be.

So I let go of one class, one I took because I wanted to take it, but not because it fulfills any requirements (those will be completed when I finish the other two classes I’m taking this semester), but because I enjoy it and because it’ll help me to be a better social worker and a better deacon/priest. I’m still going to attend the class, but I’ll audit it and avoid having to do the project, midterm, and final. I think it’s the right decision for me right now.

Because I was out of town for two weeks running, today was my first time at Sunday Mass in a couple weeks. It’s always surprising to me how much I miss the ritual and the community when I’m away. Have I mentioned how much I love my church? Because I really really love it.

I work with an organization called the Circle of Restorative Initiatives for Maryland. We’re hosting a Restorative Justice conference Nov 15-17 in Columbia. It is going to be amazing. If you’re in the region, I strongly urge you to consider coming and learning a little about restorative justice and practices. Check it out at http://www.crimaryland.org.

I slipped on the stairs a few minutes ago. My snowman socks apparently don’t have any traction on wood floors. I’m super smrt though, so I broke my fall with my already-screwed-up right wrist. Say a little prayer that I didn’t bruise the nerve too badly again? I really really really hate when I do that, and it’s way too close to Christmas to not be able to knit for several weeks. In the meantime, I’ll be rocking this giant black and blue brace. You’re jealous, aren’t you? Don’t be. You can borrow it when I’m done.

Election day is Tuesday. Get out and vote. Today’s Gospel was the Beatitudes (we celebrated the Solemnity of All Saints today), and I truly believe there couldn’t be a more appropriate for us as the nation heads to the polls. Let us remember the poor, the outcast, the downtrodden, the suffering. Let us respond to their needs as Jesus did when he walked this earth, with loving kindness, with nonjudgmental hearts, with generous minds, spirits, and hearts, and with resources that care for immediate needs while providing for long term improvement and success.

Marylanders (and Mainers and Minnesotans and Washingtonians), the God I know and love and believe in doesn’t care if the person we fall in love with is the same gender or not. Even if God did care, civil marriage has NOTHING to do with your faith or my faith or anyone else’s faith. It’s a matter of civil rights, of equality, of providing for families.  Please, vote for equality for all.